Saturday, August 13, 2016

Hardest Goodbye

"Hello, how are you? I haven't heard from you for awhile? How have you been?"

When you love someone so much but they hurt you very deeply you cannot feel your heart is the most emotional pain you can feel. Especially when you feel like he/she stabbed you in the back. You thought it would be easy. You thought when you let him/her go, all your problems will go away. You thought all the pain would go away. You thought he/she was nothing. You thought you can just simply forget abt it but after awhile you realise deep down you still love him/her. No, you want to stick to your decision, let him/her go but it's difficult and you are still attached to him/her. It's the worse feeling when you stay, you know you would get hurt very badly but when you go it would still hurt but less yet you far away from the person you actually love. 

You told me "it's easy for you to move on..."
No it's not, I'm not over you even til this moment I still think abt you. I tried my best to make it work. I tried everything. It just didn't work. We didn't work. I decided we should go our own separate ways and stand on our two feet. The thing is, I'm still very attached to you. I just try not to show you bcs I made my decision and sticking to it. The fact is, I still cry abt you. I still miss you. I miss our times together, laughs and talks. I miss your kisses. I miss you care. I miss your tight hugs. I miss your eyes that I used to just stare at. I just miss you. And I think, deep down....

...I still love you.

Out of all the people that I've met, you are the hardest goodbye, Zaim Aidil.



Thanks for reading ^^

Friday, April 29, 2016

A Heart Needs Time To Heal

I always tell myself, I don't need to rely on anyone to be there for me. Honestly, we will always rely on at least one person and when that person puts us down, that's when we honestly break down. I was desperate for love and care since last night but I decided maybe I should write it, at least I can express myself, I figured it'll make me feel better. 

A heart,
It needs time to heal.
Mine's, never got the time. Everytime, people will keep pushing me to be okay when I'm not truly okay. Mine's was shattered and how does one expect me to be healed in a short period of time? I'm changing, I am not myself before anymore. I became a miserable person rather than the happy go lucky person I was before. Why push someone who's been hurt so much when you were the one who did the damage? You're doing even more damage when you force someone to be okay rather than talk them through saying that you will always be there. I'm not a robot, I have feelings, I need time to heal.

Thanks for reading ^^